Sickies in March

Seems like our troubles have started back in January... and we still haven't recovered. Lets face it being sick is no fun. Having sick kids is really no fun, but having sick kids and being sick yourself is just awful! Luckily we didn't over lap too much, but it came close.
We were on our way to a friends birthday party when Sascha felt sick in the car. She complained of a tummy ache that morning, and I thought it was just because she was hungry so I made her eat (not a good idea when the kid has a stomach bug!). All of her breakfast came out in my car. So needless to say we turned the car around and she missed out on a really fun party for her friend's Bree's birthday. Poor kid had a stomach ache most of the day, ate very little (and I didn't push it this time), had fallen asleep and then had a 101 fever, but felt much better after we gave her medicine. The next day she seemed fine. Yay!

The day after I went to work and started feeling pretty tired in the afternoon. No biggie... since I am always tired these days, hah... the joy of parenthood. Plus it was a Monday, so people always feel a bit sluggish on Mondays. Little did I know that I was in for a big surprise. I have never had a Stomach flu, and once it hit, things got pretty brutal. I am so glad the kids were put to bed by then and didn't even wake up when the ambulance was called. Yes I got to ride in an ambulance to the ER! To spare way too many details, I kept passing out, so J couldn't get me to ER any other way. I certainly scared the living lights out of him every time I blacked out. It happened 5 times, after the 2nd time he had our doctor paged and was advised to call 911. Apparently I may have what is called a Vasovagal reflex where you pass out due to some triggers. Plus I was dehydrated. So the wonderful people in ER made me feel much better after 2 bags of fluids through the IV and some anti-nausea medicine and we were on our way home by 4AM.

Of course we had to call my mom to stay with the kids, and little did we know my mom actually had the same stomach bug, and started getting sick as well, so she had to call my dad to come over in the middle of the night. I was pretty useless the rest of that day and didn't get up much, but started to feel better towards the evening. It was so hard to keep away from the kids, but in no way shape or form did I want to pass on this horrible sickness to them. Luckily I think at least I succeeded at that.

The next Sunday we found out Sascha had once again gotten sick with a UTI. We avoided having to go to Children's ER, and were able to see her pediatrician and start antibiotics. Now we have to repeat the VCUG test (dreading it already!) and the ultrasound. I was in shock... why? why now again? after over a year and half UTI free, the surgery was proven successful. What happened? I was so upset and emotional that day, I just couldn't' help it. I thought we were done with this whole VUR thing, isn't that why we had decided on the surgery in the first place? It sucks feeling this helpless, especially with your children. After the initial shock and sadness wore off, I realized this is completely out of our control, and once again we just have to believe and hope for the best, because there is really no point in mopping around.

Until we do the tests (which our guess will tells us that there is no reflux... since it's been fixed), we won't really know. We're trying to change a few potty habits, like drinking more, going potty every few hours and not waiting until she really really has to go (she does that a lot!) and also no more baths, she will have to start getting used to big girl showers! So we'll see if that makes a difference.

The next weekend, I had high hopes. No more sick babies or parents! Not so fast... we went to yet another Bday celebration and Cameron got sick and vomited all over me and himself. Oh boy! When does it end?
I also wasn't feeling so hot that day... but poor Cameron! I have no idea what it was too because poor kid got his 15 month shots on Friday, and then daddy gave him his first bites of a peanut butter sandwich, and you got sick an hour after and had red marks on your face and were itching your neck. So was this a virus? an allergic reaction to peanuts? I have no idea... you slept for a little while, then woke up crying to I held you and you fell asleep for another hour in my arms and then seemed perfectly happy. No fever. Still woke up the next day with a runny nose and bad cough.

So the fun in the Lewis household continues. I am really not sure why it's so bad this year, but every week I hope that this is the tail end of it. Both daddy and I also have mild colds right now, nothing too terrible just runny noses and coughs. I guess I can handle that... nor do I have a choice.

Well I hope we are back to healthy by the end of the week and it stays that way!

Meanwhile here are some photos from the some fun things we did in the last few weeks despite being sick.
A few from a park outing with great grandma Dotti... it was brrr cold that evening!
Daddy never says no to some tent building in the family room. Even Cameron and I climbed right in.


The girls next door heard that Sascha was sick and made her lemonade, lemon cupcakes and brownies from the lemons picked in our back yard. Kids swinging after dance class.
Deda and Baba went out to dinner and dessert with us.
Cameron after his bath... I was contemplating getting him a haircut, but then decided to wait a little while longer... it's just too sad for me to cut his adorably precious little curls off! He will look like a boy from then on and not a baby. I am just not sure I am ready for it.


Daddy and kiddos swinging in the kitchen. Cameron playing with his cars. Cameron waiting in the dance studio. Pictures of La Jolla and our wonderful morning breakfast (the kids were  at grandpa David's house for the night) so we got a date night and a morning all to ourselves. It was a perfect day at the beach.Yippee!
Celebrating more March Birthdays at Benihana, morning snuggles and cartoons.
Kids enjoying my a juice I made (my newest purchase  - a Juicer, in attempts to create some healthy eating and drinking habits) Who knows may be it will prevent us from getting sick so often.

Recovering

Happy to say that once we got home, things got so much easier. Sascha has been doing very well. The catheter was taken out 1 week after the surgery, which was not a big deal to take out, you fussed for 10 seconds and it was all over. I wanted it out sooner, but the nurse suggested we keep it in for a few extra days. The reason I wanted it out sooner is because we noticed a little bit of blood near the insertion area as well as the diaper after a few days, but apparently that's normal and mostly because she became a bit more active in walking around and even jumping a few days after we got home from the hospital. Once she got it out, we came home and I tried to have her go potty. She refused, cried, threw a big fit and I stopped trying. My mom came over an hour later to stay with Sascha so that I could go to work, but I didn't feel comfortable leaving until I knew she could go on the potty, so we tried again. We sat her Pooh Bear on the toilet, bribed her with stickers and candy and after 5 or 10 minutes she agreed to sit down. Another few minutes went by and she went pee pee. I've never been so releaved in my life! She was very proud of herself as well, and we gave her all the treats we promised. Since she did well that day, I thought she was ready to go back to daycare. Galia was so happy to see her, she gave her a big hug when we arrived. I picked Sascha up, and she didn't have a single accident all day, which I thought was great. When we got home, I asked if she wanted to go on a potty, and she said no. Sure enough in another 15 minutes I noticed your wet pants. You just didn't want to go on a potty at home. Well getting you out of those pants was a whole other story. You had a total tantrum meltdown. I tried to take them off and you refused, then I asked if you could do it yourself and you wouldn't, so this battle lasted for a little while. Eventually I got the pants off, but the underwear you still refused to take off. Well later I realized you just are so nervious about being touched in the lower area of the abdomen, that you don't want us to change you. May be that's why you didn't want to go on the potty, because that would require us to get close to the incision. You have also refused to go #2 on a potty and seem to be totally content going in your pants. :( Well another week has passed by, you have gotten a bit better about it and more trusting. I usually say, "I will be very careful and gentle" and you say it back "be very careful" and "gentle". It's very cute! Another thing you've started to hate is bath time. We weren't able to give you one for over a week and just gave you a sponge bath and tried to wash your hair and it was an absolute disaster. So now, before bedtime you say "no bath! later". Another funny thing you've been saying almost every time we drive is "be carefull mommy". You also say it to daddy. And a few times you have complained that it hurts and you need medicine and you point to your lower tummy. Poor little munchkin, I hope you forget all about it soon!!!

We have a follow up appointment with her doctor next week, and I am pretty sure you'll be cleared for your usual activity. It's been hard to keep you away from climbing up the playground in the back yard, jumping, running and doing your usual active stuff. The tape has fallen off the incision, and it's looking like it's healing up very nicely. I still look at it in disbelief that you even have it. The other interesting thing that we noticed is that you pee differently now. You seem to be able to hold it in longer, and when you go, you sort of take your time, you stop in the middle and then go some more and then some more... seems like you're able to empty your bladder, or at least that's what I am hoping. I will definitely mention it to the doctor and hope that it's a positive and not a negative.

So now that we're over the hard stuff, it's just a matter of time to get the tests done. I am sure 2 months will fly by very quickly. I will try not to think about it too much, just really hope that we did the right thing by having this surgery.

As hard as this experience was to go through, especially being 31 weeks pregnant, I know that people go through a lot worse. I can be grateful for an amazingly supportive and loving husband, the family and friends we have in our lives and for our health. When you go through tough times, it really puts things in perspective for us. What's really important and what's not. The everyday things we may complain about and be unhappy about all dissapear when you or someone you know is going through a tough time. Even when the kid has a cold or other sickness, it's so hard to watch them suffer. You just want to take that pain away, and have it be you going through it instead of them. Really makes you appreciate life when everyone is healthy!

On another note, I decided to take Sascha to preschool for circle time for about an hour to get her familiar with the classroom, her teachers and the kids. She seemed very excited at the idea, and when we got there they were just starting to settle into circle time. You acted very shy at first and clung to me. I pulled up a small chair to where the kids were and sat down, and you stood at my feet the whole time. Once the activities began, you couldn't wait to go explore, you tried just about every station, and didn't even notice that I stepped out for 5 minutes to go to the front desk to make sure the director had all our paperwork. I could hardly get you away... and once the activities were put away, I asked you to say bye to your teachers Ms. Holand & Ms. Robin as well as the kids, and we headed back to the car. You kept saying I want to go to preschool, and then you saw the playground and started crying that you didn't want to leave. I guess I will take that as a good sign. :) I told you that we would be coming back here in just 1 week, and that right now we're going to see Galia at daycare. You said "No Galia" which was very surprising, because a lot of times you will ask to see her.
I think you are really going to like preschool, and both Daddy and I are looking forward to this next phase.

I haven't taken many pictures lately... this one is a few months old, but it's such a favorite of mine. It's been my desktop background at work for a while now

Post-Surgery

At last we are home 3 days later! 3 of the most difficult days we've ever had. This is going to be a record long post of mine. I'll start from the beginning:

We planned to arrive at the hospital on Wednesday at 1pm since the surgery got moved to 2 hrs earlier than originally scheduled. You didn't really have any idea why we were going there, although I told you that we're going to go to see the doctor and he is going to fix your little problem so you won't have to take medicine every day. You seemed ok most of the day without eating (not very surprising since you are not a good eater to begin with). Only, right before we were leaving you started asking for snacks and we quickly put you in the car and left. I remember Daddy and I staring at each other for a moment before we turned on the car. We knew we were about to begin a really tough day.

We checked in, signed all the paperwork, and a few nurses talked to us about the procedure and took your vitals. First they asked you to put on a "special shirt" and explained that little girls who wore the special shirt got a popsicle later. You seemed very excited about the idea of getting a popsicle, and you quickly pulled off your shirt and asked for help to put on the special one. There was also a number of bright fake fish tanks that you seemed very interested in, as well as stickers. You must have asked the nurse who gave you a sticker to give you more about 10 times. She thought you were cute and couldn't resist allowing you to raid her sticker stash again and again.

Then we just waited until about 3pm, at which time the doctor walked in to talked to us about what to expect, and to see if we had any concerns or questions. As usual, we were concerned about the bladder catheter, and whether you shouldn't have it because we thought you would attempt to pull it out at your first opportunity. We agreed that he would simply make the decision during the surgery. After we talked he made a comment to you about how pretty your shirt was, and you immediately replied with "I want to get a popsicle." It was just precious. Afterwards the anesthesiologist came in with the nurse to meet you. They mentioned that we would be going to the "popsicle room" in just a few minutes. It was almost time.

At that point I gave you a huge hug and a kiss, and daddy asked if we could go in to be with you until you went to sleep, and they only let daddy come because of the gas and me being pregnant. Once you left the room, I was really upset, then I saw Daddy come back in and he was upset too. He said that you were happy to be going to the popsicle room and were very excited, but then when you entered the operating room you had a puzzled look on your face. You got to pick a strawberry flavor for your mask, and after Daddy lifted you up on the operating table, you got to smell the mask, but that after a few seconds of laying there with the mask on your face, you started to say "All done!".

We then both moped our way to the cafeteria to get some food and wait. After about 2 hours we were called from the waiting room and talked to Dr. Aligiri who operated on you. He said that surgery went well and you are sleeping in a recovery room where they will call one of us over to be with you once you start waking up. So off we went to another waiting area and in another 40 minutes they called us in. I walked in and could hear you crying, but as soon as you saw me I distracted you with little ducky good luck charms that Aaron gave you the night before and you immediately calmed down. You went in and out of sleep most of the hour or two that we waited there until your room was ready. You seemed really groggy after anesthesia which is to be expected, but you definitely recognized us. You had a few sips water, but you weren't able to keep that down.

Since only one parent was allowed in the recovery room, Daddy and I switched back and forth. While I was in the recovery room, you asked "where is Daddy?" and when Daddy was in the room with you, your asked "where is Mommy?" Grandpa David came and waited in the waiting room with us too, to keep each of us company. Also, our friend Jacob came to see you and he was able to just walk into the recovery area with his badge since he is a second year resident there. He read the surgery report and assured us that everything went well.

Finally we got transported to your room. Baba and Deda came to see you shortly after. The charge nurse allowed us both to stay in the room with you that night even though it was against the policy, however, there was only one chair that pulled out into a semi-bed, and a regular chair. Needless to say it was incredibly uncomfortable. You seemed to be super tired and out of it, so we were hoping you would go to sleep. That is definitely not something you or we did that night. You started to have bladder spasms, so they put you on Ditropan, and then your diaper wasn't wet at all, so a few hours later they had to pull the urine out of the catheter connected through a small incision directly to your bladder, that they put in during surgery. We worried about having this stent in from the very beginning thinking you would pull it out. Sure enough the first night once you got a bit more alert you wanted everything out, the stent and the IV. You started screaming in Daddy's arms saying "take it out!!!" and we had to put arm restraints on you so that you couldn't bend your arms. After all that, you finally fell asleep for a little while and so did we. Most of the night you did not sleep more than a few hours. We noticed that a lot of fluid was leaking out of your incision, so the nurse had to reinforce it with more padding. Thank God we were both there because I don't think we could have gotten through it on our own, I know I couldn't have.

The next day seemed like it was going to get better. You asked to go potty, actually went, and you had a few wet diapers too. This was the best thing you could have done, so we were very excited at the progress. Once the doctor heard that, they decided they would take the stent out, and lower your fluids so that you can start to want to drink things on your own. You walked a little bit and we went in the playroom, and you seemed to be doing ok. A few hours went by and you weren't drinking or eating, and the one time you tried a tiny bite (because Daddy and I were begging you to eat so that we could go home), you once again couldn't keep it down. So they decided to keep you for another night. I think you were very nauseous from the tylenol with codeine, even though they gave you anti-nausea medication, so we switched to regular tylenol.

Later that evening you seemed to be in a better mood, and I started to feel cramps in my tummy so my parents talked me into going home with them so I could get a few hours of solid sleep and come back in the early morning. It broke my heart to leave, but I felt like it was probably for the best, since we didn't want to go into preterm labor. I returned back to the hospital by 6:30 am, but did not get good news. You didn't drink or pee very much, so they upped your fluids again, and you ran a small fever. I found you sleeping in daddy's mini-couch with him. He once again had only a few hours of sleep. That morning was pretty miserable, not only did you not eat or drink, you stopped peeing. By noon that day it had become a big concern and if you didn't pee in the next hour, the doctor wanted to put a catheter in. You were clearly so uncomfortable. Any time we put you on your feet you must have felt the pressure from the bladder and cried to get picked up. You fell asleep on daddy multiple times. You were never as comfortable on my lap, it must have been my big tummy pushing up against yours, luckily you have an amazing Daddy, he knew how to comfort you, and make you feel better, and he helped keep me sane through out these crazy few days.

So for the next hour or may be even two we begged, bribed and did everything to make you go on a potty or in your diaper. You kept saying it hurts, so you were back on tylenol with codeine. Then you kept saying that you will try to go in your diaper, but it didn't happen. We don't know why... may be once you were off the stronger med, you felt the pain and decided you didn't want to do that anymore, after all it's one of the few things you still had control over... your bladder. The staff at Children's even set up a little lunch date for you in the playroom with another little girl who was recovering from surgery. They tried everything they could as well, including outright bribes of Disney and Dora books. Nothing could tempt you.

By 2pm, they had to cath you. Daddy and I felt defeated, frustrated, and extremely upset, the one and only thing we were trying to avoid was going home with any external things that you would be able to pull out. Now, having an extra incision for the stent that was pulled out a day earlier was totally pointless, but who could have known. We certainly did not want to watch you go through getting that put in again like they do during your yearly bladder test. You actually did ok with 3 nurses standing over you putting in a catheter. I was more of a mess. I am sure you were once again frightened, but we turned on the TV to have you focus on something other that what was being done and daddy hovered over you to try and distract you as well. It actually wasn't as horrible as we expected and we could tell how much better you felt once they relieved that pressure, your poor tummy was so hard for hours.

The doctors came in to talk to us an hour later and said that we would go home with it, they assured us that it's actually for the best because you won't have a chance to overextend your bladder and damage the repair that they had done during the surgery. They said if we want we can stay an extra night, or we could see how you do for a few more hours and decide to go home in the evening. We had lunch outside, while Grandpa held you in his arms and you watched a little girl run around on the playground. You no longer had a fever, you managed to eat a few crackers, and seemed like you were drinking too, so we decided it would be best to go home. They showed us how to take care of the bag, and got us ready to go home. Some of the things you constantly said while at the hospital: "Take it off!" - about the IV, "Don't touch!" - when we would open your diaper or touch any other part that would hurt, "Pick - a - me up!" - you hated the crib bed you laid in, and wanted to be held and comforted, "I want to go home!" - this broke my heart multiple times.

As soon as you realized we were going home, you seemed different. You started talking, and you even said bye, thank you, and blew a kiss to your wonderful nurse Jen. Grandpa helped carry you and our things to the car, and we headed home. When we got home, we put you on a chair and I offered you some yogurt and you gladly took it. I was shocked. Then Baba and Deda came, as well as Inna, Grisha and Aaron. You were very excited to see all of them, especially Aaron. After they visited for a little while, we put you to bed. We were going to keep you in our bed so that you can be close, but you said you wanted to go into yours, and once we laid you down, you didn't move much. I checked on you multiple times during the night and we emptied your pee-bag once and you didn't even wake up. You got up around 7:30am and were ready for your milk and requested to see "Beauty and the Beast". You complained about something hurting so we gave you some Tylenol. Your first day at home was wonderful, you ate, you drank a ton, and we kept you busy with all the new books, and toys that you got while at the hospital.

You sure got a lot of things while being there. Grandpa Dave was able to find Donald Duck for you, and that sure put a smile on your face. You've been asking for Donald for months... and I haven't been able to find one for you. You also got a Raggedy Ann doll from Terri - a coworker who passed it along to my mom, Baba also brought a Matreoshka - russian nested doll that you love to play with at their house to look for Malenkaya - the smallest little doll that you find at the very end of opening up all the other dolls. You got a ton of new books from others who came to see you, and a few from the nurses at the hospital. The staff there was just wonderful. What difficult jobs they have to take care of sick kids! Our families and friends have been so incredibly supportive throughout this whole ordeal. Everyone who knows and cares about you called us or our parents, texted, or messaged on Facebook to see how you were doing just about every day that we were at the hospital. We are truly thankful and appreciative for all of their love and support. It was such a tough time for us and we knew that we were in everyone's thoughts and prayers that you would recover well.

So back to being at home.... you wouldn't take a nap, even though you looked really tired. Baba and I tried for a few hours in our bed, your bed, the couch... you just wanted to play. You became so much more active, you were able to get up on your own, walk around freely (even though you had a bag strapped to you leg). We kept you in your footy PJ's all day so that it would hide the bag and you couldn't easily access it, and it actually worked very well. At first you hated when we did anything w/it, but then you discovered that it really doesn't hurt at all, so now you don't seem to mind it. I couldn't be more thrilled with how today went!!! It would have been nice to have you nap too, but hey... we can't have it all can we?

I refused to take pictures of you at the hospital. I think more than anything I want to forget that you were ever there. Daddy took a picture of you with his phone in the playroom the day after surgery when you were actually doing fairly well. So here is one from the playroom in your little gown playing with dinosaurs and another few after we got home.

First few minutes at home surrounded by your toys

The next morning reading one of your new books on the floor with Daddy

Pre - Surgery

Well, it's a few days before your surgery, and I must say even though the last couple of weeks I have seemed to accept the fact that this is happening, I am still so uneasy and nervous. A few days ago, you developed a weird cough at night and I got really paranoid that you're getting sick and we may have to reschedule, but so far no other symptoms, so hopefully this is nothing to worry about.

I have been reading all sorts of things online about your condition (VUR) and the bilateral ureter transplant which is the official name of your surgery. There are definitely risks involved, like bladder spasms, infections and etc, but I have been reading about many success stories as well, after all this surgery has been performed for almost 100 years, and has 98-99 % success rate. I am so thankful that this can be done to fix your bladder problem. We are hoping and praying that you get through it well. I hope to keep it together and stay strong for you, lately I have been able to, but being pregnant I think I am twice as emotional, mostly it's when I think about leaving you for 2 or 3 agonizing hours of the actual procedure where we won't be able to know anything or see you and the fact that even if we explain what's happening to you, you won't really understand and you'll still be scared. I can't wait for it all to be over and hopefully forget all about this.

I already made your follow up tests in 2 months (the dreaded VCUG and an ultrasound), so in December we will find out for sure if you are reflux free and can be taken off the antibiotics for good. Hopefully that will be the last VCUG you will ever have to go through. Of course you will still need follow up ultrasounds to make sure your kidneys are developing well and there are no other issues.

I wonder how I will be able to keep you from eating on the day of the surgery. You can only have a light breakfast before 8am. Sometimes you are not even awake at 8am, and then when you ask for food at lunch, I will have to tell you no. :( You can only have liquids before 11am, and at 2pm we have to cut off everything. We may get a call to be able to move the surgery time to earlier than 5pm which will help this situation.

I've been putting together a list of things to take to the hospital, your favorite things, a few new toys, dvds. I really hope we figure out how to have both daddy and I spend the night with you since they only allow one person and he is insisting that I go home and rest. Hopefully it's just one night that we have to spend at the hospital, if all goes well during the surgery and your recovery, I think we may be going home the next evening.

The following 3 weeks we have to keep a close eye on your activities, keep you away from climbing things and swinging from the monkey bars because of the abdominal incision that needs time to heal. That I am sure will prove to be challenging because you are super active. Galia at daycare often says that you are definitely one of the most active children there. So we may have to keep you inside a lot, I am pretty sure you'll be watching a lot of TV! I guess it's one of the perks of being sick. Enjoy it while you can, since we are planning on you going to preschool a month after this surgery. It's cute, but you've said a few times now how you want to go to school, I think you'll really like preschool!

One of our few trips to the beach this summer. Apparently this summer has been one of the coolest summers in the last 30 years. We only had about a week or two when the temperatures got up to upper 90's. I of course am very thankful for a cold summer. It's no fun being pregnant in the heat. :)

Daddy drew Mickey and Minnie for you. You loved it! They are your favorite!

Potty training sure doesn't come easy

I must say that I've been dreading the whole potty training thing for over 6 months.

I first started on this process back in May, and it didn't go too well. Then I decided not to push it, although we tried stickers, M&M's, sticker chart, big girl underwear with Elmo and Mickey & Minnie on them. You went #2 more often than #1, but it was always on your terms, you never would sit on a potty when I asked you to. Well a few months have gone by and I've decided to start getting serious about it once again, especially after hearing that you go at the day care all the time, I thought it was mostly because all the other kids go, so everyone does it at the same time, and then you are interested. So I suggested that you wear underwear and not pull ups anymore, and we're now on day 3 and it's been going ok. So far you've had 1 accident at the daycare per day. At home we are once again having a tougher time. The first day as soon as we got home, you went in your clothes, then I changed you, and almost immediately you did it again, and then for the 3rd time, this was all within 1 hr of being home... I was like what? So I stopped putting anything on you and let you run around naked, and you went on the potty twice #1 and later #2. The 2nd day was a bit better, you promised to keep "minni" dry... and when I took you on the potty once we got home you went, so I trusted you. Well we had 2 accidents, and then once again I had to leave you naked. I am not sure what it is, but you seem to remember to go on the potty when you're naked, not when you're wearing underwear & clothes. And pull ups don't really help at all, you have no problems going in them. So we'll see how this weekend goes. You are still pretty excited to get treats like M&Ms and princess and kitty cat stickers so hopefully that can keep you motivated. I still don't think you have very good control of it though... so once we go out in public I am not sure what to do, put you back in pull ups or keep you in underwear and just let you have accidents? Well one way or another I think we're getting there and I am excited about that!

The other thing which delayed me sticking to this potty training is we went to visit your urologist after having your annual VCUG and ultrasound tests done. He told us that it's actually harder for you to be able to go #1 and get everything out, since some of urine refluxes back into the kidney it's almost impossible for you to really empty your bladder all the way.

So more on the topic of visiting the doctor. This year we were able to have your VCUG done w/sedation. You were such a good girl through it all. It was still tough towards the end because they took the gas off, and you realized what was going on and started crying... but it was still easier than the previous years! Since I couldn't be in the xray room, I just observed from the window, and daddy was so amazing with you, he had Mickey mouse toy on his shoulder, and Mickey Playhouse episode playing on the Blackberry so that you can just focus on the show and now the scary things that are going on around you. Ultrasound on the other hand was super easy, you laid down without a problem and we told you that the lady will just take pictures of your tummy and your back, and you didn't seem to care one bit. You got a ton of stickers at both appointments and you were one happy little girl.

The actual urology appointment was a bit tougher for me to handle. We already knew after your VCUG that you still have the reflux, although we didn't know if it had improved at all, I knew that chances of that are very low, so going into our doctors appointment I thought I had prepared myself for bad news - which is having to do the surgery. Daddy and I have discussed this prior, and both agreed that we didn't want to wait another year and have you on more antibiotics, and then having to repeat the awful VCUG test once again, when chances less than 20% of it actually fixing itself. So like I thought the options were presented to us, and we quickly agreed on surgery especially since baby #2 will be here in November, and it will be much easier for both of us to focus on you 100% of the time and help you recover. After both the doctor and the nurse went over surgery details, I broke down... I couldn't handle it anymore. I kept looking over at you, of course you had no clue what we were talking about, you were just roaming around the room, jumping and looking out the window and I felt so sad that you have to go through something like this... and I still get really emotional thinking about it, and I think about it almost daily. I am sure it doesn't help that I am emotional as it is due to pregnancy. It just became so real, and my eyes tear up at the thought of it.

I am of course thankful for the fact that this condition is not really life threatening and treatable, and it's fixable with surgery (this kind of open surgery is 95% effective, so we definitely have high hopes that it will have a positive outcome). I am thankful for how advanced things have become in the medical world, and that I have the luxury to take my child to a place like Children's hospital where they will take very good care of you, and of course I must only think positive and hope for the best. With all that said, I can't help but feel scared and helpless. Your surgery is scheduled for middle of October... which is so far from now. I was really hoping to be able to get it over with quickly in August or September, but the urologist we see seems to be all booked up. We are on the wait list in case something gets canceled but it's not likely. Now I have to delay your preschool start as well, but that's really the least of my worries, I just hope to get through this quickly and have a successful result.

These un-related to potty training :) pictures were taken at your nephew Aaron's All Star Baseball Game. You hardly sat still through any of it, but we enjoyed coming to watch him play. Even though I or Baba chased you around most of the time. You climbed on these really dirty bleacher seats and we were telling you to get down and be careful not to hurt yourself, and you were making these funny faces at us.

This is just one of many


Just a pretty blue eyed little girl that we love to pieces!

Post doctor's appointment update

Sascha had a rough week, but I am glad it's over with. Monday we took her to get an Ultrasound and VCUG. The ultrasound went ok, you started crying as soon as we laid you down on the table. You are just terrified of doctors, pretty much as soon as you walk in, I can see it in your face. We loaded some mickey mouse playhouse videos on daddy's phone and were able to distract you at least briefly. Then we went back to the waiting room to wait until we get called to do the next test. You of course cried through that one as well. The most awful part of it was that once the dye was inserted into your bladder and the catherer pulled out, you kept holding it, you wouldn't pee. So we just had to stand there and watch you cry and wait for you to pee, because that's when they start taking video and pictures of the bladder and kidney area. It seemed like forever, although I am sure it was no longer than a minute or two. Daddy didn't leave your side, he held up your mickey toy and the video playing... although it didn't stop you from crying. I stood over to the side, holding my breath and counting the seconds till they were finished. At least everyone there was very nice and helpful. We even found out that next time we have to do this, we can request for 'sedation', where they'd give you some laughing gas and you won't remember much after they do this, and hopefully have an easier time with it. Next time it has to be requested along with the referral and apparently those appointments book up 3 months in advance. The radiologist told us that the reflux is definitely still present and it still looks pretty severe, but we'd know more once we saw the doctor because he will review and compare with last years test results.
The doctor visit was pretty short. He said there were no changes in the reflux :( and it's still on both sides, class III and class IV, because it's a high grade reflux, you only have about 25% chance of outgrowing it... which is small, but he suggested it's worth to wait at least another year and keep you on the antibiotics, unless of course you get another UTI. The good news is that the ultrasound showed that your kidneys look good, so the past UTIs haven't done any serious damage, which is why we're able to wait it out a little longer. But most likely he'll start talking about the surgery next year. I guess we'll cross that bridge when we get to it, luckily from what I've been reading, the surgery is about 95-98% successful.
I am just glad you don't refuse to take the medicine every night, sometimes you push it away and don't want to take it, but we've figured out ways to distract and not force it.

Another UTI

We've done so well since last November and you haven't had any UTI infections being on the antibiotic, but unfortunately we didn't make it through a whole year without one. You got sick last week with a fever, no other symptoms... how familiar. I decided with your previous history of UTIs and the reflux I don't want to wait till day 3 so on the 2nd day we went to the doctor. Daddy took you in a few hours before our actual appointment to try and get a urine sample. You hate going to the doctors, you don't like anything that they do, even measure your temperature. After a few hours, we were finally able to collect a sample and it tested negative for a UTI, I was a bit relieved and thinking it's just something viral. But of course the sample had to get sent to the lab for a culture, so I knew we weren't completely in the clear. I no longer wait for the doctor to call, I called them the next day to see if there were any results and after checking we were told that the results hadn't come back and we wouldn't know till the following Monday since this was a Friday. Once again I convinced my self that this must be something Viral, the doctor told me to look for a rash after the fever goes away, that you may have Roseolla. Well Saturday came and in the morning I noticed that your upper lip looked a bit bluish, which was a bit of a concern. It was something that I remember my mom telling me that you had right before your febrile seizure last year. We were still giving you Motrin and Tylenol. When you woke up from your nap, you were burning up, when placed you on the changing table I noticed you started shivering and once again your lips looked bluish. Needless to say when I saw that I became very worried. This all was too similar to what had happened last October and I wasn't even there for it. I measured a 102 fever, I saw it quickly going up, and next time I measured it was 103, we gave you Motrin right away. Of course I got really scared and tried to reach the doctors office to talk to the on call doctor. She called us in the next hour and said she will check on the lab. Sure enough we got another call from her later that evening confirming that the test came back positive for UTI and we need to bump up the antiobiotic doses. Aaah! So frustrating!

So your yearly check up tests are in a couple of weeks... I am definitely dreading that day! The ultrasound is not too bad, I think we can distract you with that one, but the VCUG is so hard to watch, I am going to feel horrible for having you go through it especially since the last UTI pretty much lets me know that you have not grown out of your reflux yet (I still hope though!), unfortunately there is no other choice but to still do the tests and then your visit to the pediatric urologist will follow up so I will post an update on that soon.
I am happy to say that you are back to your old self, seems like the antibiotics worked in within 24 hrs once we upped the dose!

Here is a cute little picture of you when you started to feel better and wanted to play. You actually sat down the penguin in the chair then lined up your duckies on the table and sat down yourself. I guess you are already starting some pretend play. So adorable!

Vesicoureteral reflux

Here is the definition from Wikipedia:

Vesicoureteral reflux (VUR) is an abnormal movement of urine from the bladder into ureters or kidneys. Urine normally travels from the kidneys via the ureters to the bladder. In vesicoureteral reflux the direction of urine flow is reversed (retrograde).

So we've been busy going to Children's hospital for the last 2 weeks and it has been the hardest few weeks since you were born. You've been diagnosed with the above condition after we went in for an ultrasound and a VCUG test. On a scale from 1 to 5, your reflux is about a 3/4 on one side and 4 on another which is pretty severe. This of course explains why you've now had 2 UTI infections in the last 5 months. So we went to a pediatric urologist for a consult and it looks like for now you'll be put on a prophylactic dose of antibiotics and we now hope for no breakthrough UTI infections. There is a high chance that you may grow out of this condition by the age of 5 or 6, as many children do especially in the lower grade reflux. However if you still get UTIs even though you're on antibiotics, we'll have to explore the option of surgery. We are of course hoping to not have to worry about surgery since you are still so little and it would be so hard to have to put you through something like that. The VCUG test alone took a lot out of me, it was so hard to watch you cry. They had to put a catheter in so that they can insert the dye into your bladder and then take X-ray to monitor where the dye would go. You had no idea what was going on, and I am sure you were pretty scared as you had two sandbags hold your arms down and a nurse hold your legs to make sure you didn't move too much while they were taking a X-ray. I am sure that was pretty traumatic, although you recovered quickly, just as soon as I was able to pick you up. Then you fell asleep on the way home, whimpering every now and then.

Meanwhile we're just adjusting to the fact that we have to give you medicine daily. You've done very well with Keflex for the last few weeks, but we're switching the antibiotic today, and I am hoping that you will still be ok taking it... I know it would make it a lot easier on us and you.

While we were gone ...

A quick recap, you got 2 of your front teeth, you got sick and went to Children's hospital only to be tested and sent home, and the next day your fever got so high that you went to Children's in an ambulance... our poor little munchkin.

It seemed like the longest week of my life... I wasn't even sure if I should write about this because I bet every time I read this I will get upset...here goes...

We left you with grandma on Friday night and flew to Boston. Saturday you seemed fine, but Saturday evening you started to run a fever and were pretty much up most of the night with my mom and sister. Sunday they took you to the hospital and took a urine sample because last time you had the same symptoms, high fever, smelly urine, and very fussy. They put a catheter in and took a sample. It returned negative for a UTI and they sent you home with a virus diagnosis and gave you Motrin and Tylenol to keep the fever down. Meanwhile the sample got sent to the lab for further 24 hr testing and cultures. The next night was very tough as well. By 3pm the next day, your temperature shot up to 105 and you started shaking and Tylenol/Motrin were not working, you got to the hospital by ambulance and the doctor checked the the test which was taken a day and half ago of course showed that you indeed had a UTI. Ugh... and no one called to let us know that, they had the results before hand.

Fortunately they were able to get your temperature down and you got a shot of antibiotics before returning home. I had no idea about any of this until the evening you returned. I had a feeling something was wrong from a couple of conversations I had w/my sister and mom, but they didn't tell me about the previous day because they thought it was nothing serious and didn't want to spoil our trip, but I kept trying to call the house and it was pretty late in the evening by then and no one was picking up... until of course they got home and were able to talk to me.

The next day your fever was under control and by the evening you were off Motrin and slept through the night. The important thing is that you were ok and getting better. The upsetting thing is that if not for the negligence of Children's hospital the whole 2nd trip to the ER could have been avoided along with the scary fever which caused what they called a "seizure". I can't even imagine this, and when I do my eyes swell up in tears. Neither I or daddy were even there to comfort you and for that I feel horrible. Of course you were in great hands with my mom and sister and my dad and thank god there were there, but I can't help but feel awful. I don't think we'll be going on any more trips without you, or at least not in the near future.

Now we need to go to a follow up appointment and have an ultrasound done and possibly other tests to see what might be causing this reoccurring problem. For now you are taking antibiotics and I was also told that you will keep taking antibiotics for a while to make sure it doesn't happen again, but I'll have to find out what "a while" really means.
We are of course in hopes that it's nothing serious.

On a happier note, you're growing so much. You are starting to refuse formula, not sure if it's too early to start mixing it with whole milk. You hardly ever finish your 5 or 6 oz bottle which you only get 3 times a day. Also you've gotten pretty picky with a few things that I feed you, mostly vegetables. To get you to eat them, I disguise them with kefir/yogurt and cottage cheese which you love, sometimes you totally figure out that I am tricking you and get upset, but other times I manage to get you to finish it all.

You pull up on practically everything you possibly can, and you're getting stronger and stronger on your feet. Your 3 teeth I mentioned before have come through as well. Your hair is getting super long and you're absolutely adorable.

I cannot stop taking pictures of you, because of all the wonderful moments I want to freeze in time. You are growing so fast that I sometimes wish I could just freeze time altogether. I cannot believe you are almost a year old already!

I love hats, and babies in hats

Another silly hat, and you attempting to stand on your own

Actually it was more like falling into daddy's arms after he let go

Up and down, up and down... enough energy for all!

Sick

Sitting on daddy's lap on the bus tour at the Zoo

It was bound to happen at some point. Last weekend we had a tough time... you didn't sleep well on Saturday night after we took you to the Zoo, but I didn't think much of it. Sunday afternoon you got a small fever about 100. Then a few hours later we went to Baba & Deda's house to celebrate their 40th anniversary (my parents) and you were super hot, it must have gotten to about 103. We gave you Motrin and you fussed and fussed like never before. Something was clearly bothering you. You went to bed, and then at 3am the Motrin wore off and you were burning up, I measured it then and it was 102. 9. Wow! I gave you more Motrin and you nursed for a bit. You did not feel well and did not want to go to sleep, so I tried to rock you in the chair and comfort you. Around 5am, you finally dozed off. Then 6am Monday morning I woke up to get ready for work, but decided to not wake you up and call in sick so I can take you to the doctor. We went that morning and it turns out you have gotten a UTI (Urinary Tract Infection). Not sure how, or why, but the doctor said it's more common in girls, still you're so little ... and a UTI? I picked up the antibiotic she perscribed and she asked to see her back if it doesn't get 100% better by Wednesday. Oh and I was wrong about your weight, you were 15 lbs at the doctors office... so our scale is off, and you did not gain 3 lbs in such little time like I thought, I knew it looked wrong. So I kept giving you Motrin on Monday because the fever was still high and the antibiotic hadn't kicked in yet. That was an exhausting day. Tuesday the fever dropped and stayed around 99. 5 all day. Wednesday you were back to your normal self and slept through the night. You haven't been drinking milk very well at times, but I think it's because you're trying to drop a feeding again and go from 5 to 4. We'll see what happens with that. I don't think it's related to your sickness. Also I usually try to give you antibiotic after you eat, and I've been tricking you by getting you to open your mouth when I give you a sippy cup and then quickly stick the syringe into your mouth and administer it little by little. Well you've gotten pretty smart and now avoid the sippy cup when you see me hold the medicine as well. You press your lips shut and don't want the sippy cup! Nice work... thanks for making my job harder. 

Your newest trick is trying to sit up on your own. You get a bit off the ground, and you try to grab onto stuff to pull yourself up higher. Especially on the changing table, you get a hold of the sides and start grunting, with a little bit of help you get up to sitting. Good ab work out!

The other funny thing has been your gargling, you lay down and start chatting and then all the sudden it's a gargle noise that's coming out.

I found this fascinating. How do babies differentiate from adults to kids? You love kids! Anytime there is a kid in the room or someone younger, your attention immediately goes to them. Especially your cousin Aaron, you just love him, and now you're big enough where he's not too scared to hold you. It's very cute, he tries to play with you and you stare at him and giggle and it's like there is no one else in the room. 

Ok, well lets hope you don't get any more UTIs because then I'll have to worry that there is something wrong with your kidneys.